


Win for Losing

by waldorph



Series: Illogical (√π233/hy7) [2]
Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Movie Fusion, Character Study, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-08-19
Updated: 2009-08-19
Packaged: 2017-10-02 21:26:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waldorph/pseuds/waldorph
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock's been played.  He doesn't mind too much</p>
            </blockquote>





	Win for Losing

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into Русский available: [Сдаться, чтобы победить](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1498867) by [krasnoe_solnishko](https://archiveofourown.org/users/krasnoe_solnishko/pseuds/krasnoe_solnishko)



> Written for **merisunshine36**.

Even before this, Jim had drawn away, as though mentally preparing himself for the separation, and while that would mark a growth of character, he has also refused to appoint a second in command. For such an assertive man he can be surprisingly passive-aggressive.

To say Spock is conflicted is an understatement. He feels very strongly drawn to Earth, as it is the only true home he has left, and the people with whom he is closest are Earth Humans; the people who experienced the loss of Vulcan as closely as he did, who fought for their own planet. His mother was Human.

Jim is Human.

It would be enough.

And yet there will be a new colony: New Vulcan. Jim is correct in pointing out that Spock could make a biological contribution to repopulation via the donation of sperm, but that seems… distant.

There will be much to rebuild: school systems, infrastructure, old customs- they will have to draw upon their shared knowledge and experiences in order to fashion the new colony into a functioning replication of Vulcan.

Almost all other Vulcan members of Starfleet have resigned- those who were not lost to Nero's rage.

And thinking on it makes Spock want to hunt down any other who might presume to effect genocide on an entire planet. He wants- _wants_ to go to the Neutral Zone and ensure that the Romulans are not emboldened.

Perhaps Jim has had an adverse effect upon him- perhaps he is merely feeling more Human. He _wants_ to go into space, because there is a part of him that identifies with a struggling bartender for whom the world was simply not big enough.

What he wants is irrelevant. The good of many must outweigh the desires of the one: and Spock's desires are simple: protect the Federation, protect Earth-

Stay with Jim.

Spock rests a hand on one of the shuttles, cool and inert. Jim. Even as Spock had shoved him, pressed him to be more than a bartender, he had not foreseen how effective Jim would truly be. How ruthless. How perfect. Perhaps he allowed himself to get too close, though that conjecture ignores the fact that the pull of Jim Kirk's personality rivals that of a black hole. Jim Kirk, for all intents and purposes, is red matter.

He frowns through the frozen hydrogen- he had been under the impression that his father was at the embassy, speaking with the current Vulcan ambassador to Earth. "Father," he calls. Perhaps he may again lean upon his father's wisdom as he once did as a child.

"I am not our father." He turns, and Spock sees some of his own face in the older, weary Vulcan. "There are so few Vulcans left we cannot afford to avoid each other."

"You are the mind which melded with his." Spock had sensed it- an intrusion in the pattern of Jim's mind, memories which he could not possibly have; images of himself older. Unaware of where it came from, Spock had chosen to ignore it, but it is… a relief, he supposes. To know that it was merely himself. It ought to worry him how possessive he is.

The other man looks briefly surprised. "Yes. I had not been aware you could detect it." He pauses, searching his own mind for residuals he may have gleaned from his meld with Kirk. He looks surprised. "It took us many years to reach what you have accomplished."

"The trajectory of this universe is somewhat altered from your own. I am curious- how did you persuade him to keep your secret?"

"He inferred that universe-ending paradoxes would ensue should he break his promise."

"You lied." Spock cannot countenance it- Vulcans do not lie. Manipulate, perhaps.

"Ohhh. I… I implied." He shrugs philosophically.

"A gamble." It opens realms of possibilities in how to most effectively manage Jim.

Which is irrelevant, because Jim is leaving for uncharted space for five years in approximately seven hours.

"An act of faith. One I hope that you will repeat in the future with Starfleet."

"In the face of extinction it is only logical that I resign my Starfleet commission and help rebuild our race."

"And yet you can be in two places at once. I urge you to remain at Starfleet. I've already located a suitable planet on which to establish a Vulcan colony. Spock, in this case do yourself a favor. Put aside logic: do what feels right."

Spock considers it: his older self has far greater knowledge than he, has the same genetics. He could take a wife and contribute, Spock himself might still contribute genetic material- it is permission, release; _logical_. Two of them would be superfluous.

"Since my customary farewell would appear oddly self-serving, I shall simply say: good luck."

Spock lifts his hand, watching his older counterpart walk through the hanger, and then turns, walking back to Starfleet.

"I wish to apply for the position of First Mate on _the USS Enterprise_," he informs now-Admiral Pike.

"Oh thank God," Pike exhales, relief writ large in his face. "Cancel the emergency appointment of Brenson," he snaps into his comm. Spock lifts an eyebrow. "The admiralty took it upon themselves to appoint someone to "manage" Jim."

"Logical, but a flawed plan."

"You think so?" Pike demands, leaning back in his chair. As it is a rhetorical question, Spock does not reply. "You're really cutting this to the wire, Spock."

"Unforeseen circumstances have arisen, allowing me to join the crew of _the Enterprise_," he replies. "Now, if you would commission me a shuttle to take me to the docking station, I would be most appreciative."

* * *

Jim's face, when he offers character references, is amused; his expression as they launch out is smug, which makes Spock suspect the advantageous timing of his encounter with his counterpart.

Jim promises to teach him to cheat when they both come off of Alpha shift (Yeoman Rand is cheerfully adding Spock to the duty roster)- Spock thinks back to his enrolling Jim into Starfleet, of the _Kobayashi Maru_, of their conflicts aboard this very ship and thinks that perhaps he already knows how to cheat.


End file.
